Things They'd Never Say
by vdhd
Summary: Glimpes of thoughts and feelings from the Pevensie children from their reign in Narnia to their life in England.
1. Another Day

Susan stood and watched her brothers chase her little sister Lucy around the trees in the forest. Their smiles contagious and their laughter ringing through the not too cold, not to hot fall air. They jumped and skipped and tumbled to the ground, having a fantastic time while Susan stood stiffly with a small frown on her face. The always practical girl felt that there was something wrong about Narnia. Where had they come from before?

"Su are you ready to go home?" Peter called, trudging towards her with Lucy on his back and Edmund walking a little behind the both of them.

_Home._

Images of large metal machines rolling down streets and tracks underground, sirens screaming during the night, men in uniforms packing to leave flashed through her mind.

"Susan is you ready?" Peter repeated tilting his head to the side while readjusting Lucy on his back.

"Of course." Susan said putting a fake but reassuring smile on her face. She linked arms with Edmund and started towards Cair Paravel, their real home. The pictures of those large machines filling her head, Susan couldn't help but think _that_ was their _real _home.

"No", she thought, "Narnia is home". She shook her head and gave Edmund a real smile and skipped forward dragging him along with her. She had time to be practical another day.


	2. Better

King, he would be king and then his brother and sisters would look up to him and listen to him. Lucy couldn't go crying to Peter to get her way or he would throw her in his dungeon, Susan couldn't call him silly or the wolves would drag her away. Edmund was better than his family, he just had to prove it and being king of Narnia would prove it not only to his stupid family but to every animal and bird alike.

"King Edmund" he muttered, putting his head down and trudging through the cold snow. The forest was silent and the bitter wind blew in his hair, making him shiver. _They'll all look up to me,_ Edmund thought as he stopped and looked at the large ice castle that was settled between the two mountains before him.

He put his head down once again and made his way to the castle. In the back of his head that annoying voice told him that all he wanted was his family to think better of him. Edmund scoffed and kicked the snow and made his way to the gate.

_I _will_ be better than them, _He thought as he stopped to look at the stone figures and made his way to the door.


	3. Missing

Susan stood by the mirror and checked her make-up, she was going to a party with her friends and there were supposed to be lots of cute boys there. Behind her in the mirror she could see Peter, Edmund, Lucy, Eustace and his friend Jill talking and laughing about something. Susan paused and looked intently at them.

They all had a look of graceful superiority, and wisdom to old for their young faces. It was like they carried a number of years they hadn't even experienced yet. Susan sighed and went back to her make-up, she up on her blush and reapplied her lipstick.

As Susan went to get her coat before she left she glanced one more time at her family and Jill and she felt like she was missing something. They all had a secret smile, like they knew of the best thing in the world and only they knew it. Susan felt empty and lonely, and she felt like there was something inside of her fighting to resurface.

_Knock. Knock._

Susan smiled, she almost forgot about the party. She grabbed her coat and slipped it on, she bid good-bye to her family and Jill, but they paid her no mind. Her smiled faltered and she opened the front door and hugged her friends.

As Susan walked down the cold street she wondered what they had been talking and laughing about at home. _Probably just their fairy-tales nonsense. You're not missing anything._ Susan reassured herself, but in the back of her head she knew she was lying and felt lonely once again. Telling herself that didn't help. She threw herself into some mindless chatter with her friends and buried that feeling and didn't give it another thought.


	4. Abandon

_No_, was all that Peter could think, his mind only processing that one word. Edmund walked in the snow in the distance through the gates of the mighty ice castle. Edmund was walking, willingly, into the clutches of the White Witch and it was his fault. He had yelled, insulted and drove his only brother away. Peter had no doubt in his mind that Edmund now hated him.

"Edmund!" Lucy shouted starting to rushed forward, it sounded as though her heart was breaking to Peter.

"No Lu!" Peter said grabbing her by the waist and pulling her back. She had tears running down her face, as did Susan. Susan was standing in the background with Mrs. Beaver, no doubt wishing they had never come here and were safely playing back at Professors house.

"It would be best for us to go" Mr. Beaver said, pushing slightly against Peter's leg. Peter nodded soundlessly, almost as if he had no hope. As the Pevensie's and Beavers turned their backs to the ice castle, Peter through a glance over his shoulder. He was leaving his brother, his _only_ brother, the brother he loved. Peter thought back to the last few things he'd said to his brother, and they were absolutely horrible. He was a terrible brother, and now it was too late to fix it.

Peter held hid head up high and walked forward, determined to find Aslan and get his brother back. Edmund was his brother and he'd doing anything to save him, even if he had been the one to abandon him in the first place. Peter remembered Edmund's face after he had yelled at him in the air raid, now he saw what he didn't at the time. Pain, broken pride, sadness, loneliness, anger and the worst of all, abandonment. He couldn't bear to think of Edmunds cold, unmoving figure, but the image still floated along the inside of his head and it made him sick. _No_, was all Peter could think, his mind only processing that one word. It couldn't happen, not to his Edmund, but in the back of his head Peter knew he was lying to himself. The only difference was that he _wouldn't_ let that happen.


	5. Chapter 5

Hello people I'm sorry if you thought this was an update, because it's not as you probably guessed already. I feel terrible to tell you that everything that is currently in progress is put on temporary hold due to the sudden death of my mother. I _might_ be back by the end of this week with an update for my shorter stories (which are most of my stories) but for my longer story it may be awhile. NONE OF THE STORIES ARE ABANDONED. Just fyi for everyone. Thanks again everyone!

-AMBER'EYED'COUNTESS


	6. Trust

The radiant morning sun warmed her skin and the skittish wind blew her hair around her face as she walked. Lucy walked through the silent forest and smiled sadly at the trees, they had become still and unmoving, almost as unnatural as they were during the White Witches reign, it wasn't right. The trees, just like herself, had changed. They were still beautiful but didn't hold the same life, just as she herself had been in England, something had been missing.

Change is good in some cases but in this situation it wasn't and is was all Lucy's fault. She had been the one to lead her family to Narnia, and the one to take them back. Peter had changed, Susan had changed, Edmund had changed, they all had changed, lost a little of their faith. Lost their faith in Aslan, little by little. Both Lucy and the trees had changed, but in some ways they hadn't. They both were standing tall waiting for what they needed most, a little bit of magic and a whole lot of trust. Lucy leaned against the trunk of an old oak tree and the wind blew her hair up once more, but she swore the distant roar of a lion rung in her ears and that the earth beneath her feet shifted. A little bit of magic and a whole lot of trust had brought her to wonderful places, so Lucy figured she better stick with it.


End file.
